Orhun Timur

This comedy bit is going to lose his potency after a black guy, but I love fat girls so much. I fucking love them. And you guys are looking at me like, is it the blowjubs? No. It's the love. I'm 33 years old. I am fine being the pretty girl in the relationship at this point. Like, I... Nothing... Well, actually, I've dated someone who's boyfriend before me killed himself. That's the best. Okay. I'm not saying, go find a girl and depress her boyfriend. I'm saying if you did, it would be worth. the time. It's fine. Because, dude, every time you're sad, you get a blow job. So you don't kill yourself. And it's like not normal blow job. Like normal blow job, you finish and then it ends. This one, like, if you come, you're like, I'm done. She's like, I'm not. She does it till sadness comes out effervescently. And that works with blowjaws, by the way. Blowjaws, come comes out, then sadness, then blood if you keep going. So you've got to stop, you got to stop between sadness and blood. But after a while it's dangerous because it's like every time you're horny, you get sad. Like, Paolo's dick over there. Okay, you guys don't read. You don't know who Paolo is.

It's been really nerve-wrecking back there. Because I'm watching the people go before. It's like, Open Micah legend. I'm like, can I please be after, I'm gonna buy Trinity all the alcohol or medication she needs. After this, I was like, oh, actually, I know her. I'm like, oh, please suck. I don't give a fuck about your career, please. Anyway, but now comedy. So, I'm 33. I've never gone close to marriage. I can't look at you when I say this. I have to look at a man. I've never gone close to marriage. You guys can act a little surprise, by the way. I bought a new fucking shirt for this. Fucking act surprise. All right. But the reason. The reason is because I'm a struggling comic and I really don't want to settle for someone who would settle for me. You know, I, anybody who looks at me and says, yeah, I'll waste my best egg years on him, I'm like, I don't want someone with bad judgment raising my children, you know? Anyway, thank you guys.

Oh, yeah. How are you guys? It was very fun watching what you guys did to that guy over there. Because he's more successful than me. I'm shit. I've never fucking done comedy. I never felt more like I wasted nine years of my life than... right now. It's... Okay, they're laughing. I, like, I shat myself, it just went inside back in the other way. I can actually do stuff. I'm from Turkey. It's not a happy place, you know, the state motto is, if you're happy and you know it, give it back right now. It doesn't look at it. But I was there for two years. Like, I lived in LA for a long time, then I moved back there, and then I came back here and I'm like in this time I've realized how to make America great again actually what you do is you go live in Turkey for two years and then you come back and it's fucking spectacular again stop it dude this is gonna fucking go to my head now now it's the opposite now I think oh my God I will quit at the top I don't want to do comedy again it's never gonna beat this